Today was Sunday. I had promised myself, under the rules of HADA, one day off per week. Sunday was the most logical day for this, since it's a day of rest, but I was hesitant to take a day off completely only three days into the challenge. I also really liked the idea of a floating day off, for when I start to lose steam later. So I settled on a compromise: a way to honor the spirit of the sabbath while also honoring the spirit of HADA. Today was all about doing things I normally have trouble making time for, but only those things that would be restful, uplifting, and fun.
I played in the backyard, picking up sticks and blowing bubbles with Valerie.
I sat holding Dorothy, making faces and talking to her, without trying to accomplish anything else.
I took a 2.5 hour nap.
I took a bath with Valerie.
I shaved my legs and took a bath by myself.
I finally finished the first chapter of a book I've been trying to read for several weeks.
I watched part of a documentary Jeremy wanted me to watch, and actually gave it my undivided attention.
Honestly, it feels a little too much like a day off. I'm not sure whether I should still get another day off this week. But if I need it, I'll take it.
The best part about today was how much it drove home to me the deliberateness of HADA. It's not just about being productive, it's about being deliberate about your use of time. How many hours of every day slip away, simply because I didn't choose to use them? How many hours are wasted every evening, when I know I should go to bed, but don't? How many hours are lost cycling through my regular online haunts over and over again, looking for new content? And how many otherwise beautiful moments are stripped of joy because I am thinking about what I should/could be doing instead?
Day Three tally: Well over an hour. I wasn't really counting.
Sunday, April 03, 2011
Saturday, April 02, 2011
Hour-a-Day April: Day Two
Today was Saturday. For some reason, I thought it would be easier to get my hour in on a Saturday. Jeremy doesn't work on Saturdays, and with a second adult to help with child care, surely I can be more productive, right? But with a second adult, there is a second decision-maker, a second opinion on what should happen when, and the schedule is not entirely in my control.
Normally, on a Saturday, I go to karate at 8:30, and I am home by 9:30 ready to face my day. But today Jeremy had a church breakfast thing, so I couldn't go to karate unless I walked the half mile to the karate studio, and took both girls with me. So, I skipped karate, and started my day a little bit grumpy because of it.
But the sun was shining, so when Jer got back from his breakfast, I suggested that we could go to the zoo, to make the most of a nice day. I could get my productive hour in later. The only hitch was that we had just bought a minivan last night, and Dorothy's car seat was still in Jeremy's parents' van from the last time they had driven us somewhere (our car has been out of commission for several weeks). So Jeremy drove to his parents' house to get the car seat, but the van wasn't there, because his brother had taken the van to someone else's house, and, long story short, it was well after noon before we had both car seats properly installed in our new van.
We decided that the zoo was probably too much to do at that point, but we still took the girls to the park to enjoy the sunny and not-too-cold weather. After the park, we went grocery shopping, a chore we have been neglecting for the past few, carless weeks.
While I unloaded the groceries and put them away, Valerie fell asleep watching TV with her dad. I put Dorothy down for a nap, and finally was able to start my HADA project for the day: cleaning out the old car so we can attempt to sell it. (Anyone want to buy a 1998 Mazda 626 with a busted transmission?) It took me 30 minutes to get all of our personal effects and trash out of the car, then Dorothy woke up, and it was time to start dinner, so my hour was put on hold.
Valerie was still asleep when dinner was ready, so Jer and I ate without her. Then, once she finally woke up, it took a little bit of coaxing to get her to eat her dinner. So, once I got Dorothy down for the night (I hope), it was already getting late, and I was facing the prospect of a well-rested 2.5-year-old under my feet for several more hours.
But I had done 30 minutes. Plus the 45 minutes extra from yesterday, plus the un-timed projects I had done, like taking my time properly installing the car seats in the new van, putting away groceries, making dinner, etc. That adds up to an hour, right? But I couldn't let myself start making rationalizations like that on Day Two, so I begrudgingly set a timer and started sorting the hamper of stuff that had come in from the car. When I finished, there was still a minute left, so I pulled a few things out of the box of paperwork I still need to finish sorting from yesterday, and recycled them. Bam.
Day Two tally: 1 hour. Just.
Normally, on a Saturday, I go to karate at 8:30, and I am home by 9:30 ready to face my day. But today Jeremy had a church breakfast thing, so I couldn't go to karate unless I walked the half mile to the karate studio, and took both girls with me. So, I skipped karate, and started my day a little bit grumpy because of it.
But the sun was shining, so when Jer got back from his breakfast, I suggested that we could go to the zoo, to make the most of a nice day. I could get my productive hour in later. The only hitch was that we had just bought a minivan last night, and Dorothy's car seat was still in Jeremy's parents' van from the last time they had driven us somewhere (our car has been out of commission for several weeks). So Jeremy drove to his parents' house to get the car seat, but the van wasn't there, because his brother had taken the van to someone else's house, and, long story short, it was well after noon before we had both car seats properly installed in our new van.
We decided that the zoo was probably too much to do at that point, but we still took the girls to the park to enjoy the sunny and not-too-cold weather. After the park, we went grocery shopping, a chore we have been neglecting for the past few, carless weeks.
While I unloaded the groceries and put them away, Valerie fell asleep watching TV with her dad. I put Dorothy down for a nap, and finally was able to start my HADA project for the day: cleaning out the old car so we can attempt to sell it. (Anyone want to buy a 1998 Mazda 626 with a busted transmission?) It took me 30 minutes to get all of our personal effects and trash out of the car, then Dorothy woke up, and it was time to start dinner, so my hour was put on hold.
Valerie was still asleep when dinner was ready, so Jer and I ate without her. Then, once she finally woke up, it took a little bit of coaxing to get her to eat her dinner. So, once I got Dorothy down for the night (I hope), it was already getting late, and I was facing the prospect of a well-rested 2.5-year-old under my feet for several more hours.
But I had done 30 minutes. Plus the 45 minutes extra from yesterday, plus the un-timed projects I had done, like taking my time properly installing the car seats in the new van, putting away groceries, making dinner, etc. That adds up to an hour, right? But I couldn't let myself start making rationalizations like that on Day Two, so I begrudgingly set a timer and started sorting the hamper of stuff that had come in from the car. When I finished, there was still a minute left, so I pulled a few things out of the box of paperwork I still need to finish sorting from yesterday, and recycled them. Bam.
Day Two tally: 1 hour. Just.
Friday, April 01, 2011
Five Months Old!
Dear Dorothy,
You are five months old, now. In fact, you have been for almost two weeks. I really am not sure why I've been dragging my feet on this month's letter, but I am determined to finish it today.
This month, you became even more a creature of habit than before. (I hardly thought that was possible, but you went and did it.) I used to be able to put you to sleep in a variety of ways, but this month, you would only sleep if I changed your diaper, swaddled you, took you upstairs, and nursed you to sleep. You won't even nurse most of the time unless I go through this routine first. Once, in an attempt to break you out of this pattern, I nursed you until you fell asleep, then changed your diaper and swaddled you. At which point, you nursed again (another entire feeding), and went to sleep. Oh well. I guess you really like your routines. You're still a pretty good sleeper, so I can't complain too much. You take three naps almost every day, and sleep for about 6 hours during the first stretch of the night. It's pretty awesome. I still get tired, but when I do, it's usually my own fault for staying up late playing on my computer or watching TV.
Ever since you were born, we've been trying out nicknames for you. I love your name, but it's nice to have something shorter to yell across a crowded park. We tried Dot, Dory, Doc (because your initials are DR), Dodo. Nothing really clicked. Then one day this month, I called you Dody, and Valerie jumped on it. She got so excited, and kept calling you Dody over and over again. I asked what your name was, and she answered without hesitation, "Dody AND Dorothy!" So, I guess you now have an official nickname.
We took the train to Florida this month - you, Valerie, Grandma, and me. The train trip went unbelievably well. I brought your car seat onto the train, so that when you got tired, I was able to do the whole "diaper-swaddle-nurse" routine, then put you down in a bed-like environment. I honestly got almost as much sleep on the train as I normally do at home, even with your frequent diaper blow-outs that made me really miss our cloth diapers.
We stayed with Grandmom and Granddad Wakeman in Florida, and you really loved both of them. We had such a nice visit, and the weather was fantastic. We went to the beach, and although I was very careful to keep you well-shaded at the beach, but you still managed to get a little bit of pink on your cheeks in the car on the way home. Sorry about that.
While we were in Florida, you hit a pretty big developmental milestone: You rolled over for the first time! (March 14) I knew something was up earlier this month when you started to prefer being put down on your back. This was weird, because you generally prefer to be on your front. But apparently you wanted to be put on your back so that you could roll over to your front. It was fun to watch you squirming in determination to overcome the shoulder enigma. Then, when you finally rolled over successfully (from your back to front first, contrary to what the baby books say), you looked proudly around for a few seconds, then rolled over onto your back to try again. And thus ended the "baby stays where you put her down" era.
Your personality has really blossomed this month. You love interacting with people, and it's extremely easy to get you to laugh. Your baby babble is starting to sound more and more like talking. You try to repeat the words you hear us saying, and a few times, I could have sworn that you said, "Mama," or, "I know." You're also starting to show a lot of interest in the food we are eating. Your sister used to lean in with her mouth, but you are more subtle, and try to bring food to you by grabbing our plates, silverware, or the tablecloth. Very sneaky. I'm starting to get a little bit excited about introducing you to solid foods next month. I think you'll really enjoy it.
Thanks for a great month. I'm looking forward to the next one!
Love,
Mama.
Hour-a-Day April: Day One
The girls let me sleep in today, so I had no excuses. I put on my Batman shirt as motivation and resolved to get this project off to a good start.
The first thing on my list was several days worth of dirty dishes. I wasn't sure it should technically count towards HADA, because it's just daily maintenance stuff, but I set the timer anyhow, just in case I couldn't put in the full hour. I spent 20 minutes on the kitchen/dishes.
Once I put Dorothy down for her first nap, I brought down all the boxes of mail/papers from my desk that need to be sorted. One of my least favorite jobs; I figured I would tackle it first.
After 40 minutes, I still had a lot to do, and I was on a roll, so I finished the hour sorting papers. Then I spent about another 10 minutes getting to a good stopping place. I still have another box to go, but it's the oldest box, so it should go the fastest. (I much prefer to sort old mail - it's mostly bills that I already paid online, or first notices where I responded to the second notice, and the occasional expired coupon that I probably never would have used anyhow, but can now throw out guilt-free.)
Then I called State Farm and got the van we're buying added to our insurance, the Mazda taken off, and finally added renters insurance. 15 minutes.
Day One tally: 1 hour 45 minutes. And it's only 1:20 pm; I might still try to squeeze in a bit of fun productivity, like finally finishing Dorothy's birthday letter or making some play dough. No super-heroic acts, but we're off to a pretty good start!
The first thing on my list was several days worth of dirty dishes. I wasn't sure it should technically count towards HADA, because it's just daily maintenance stuff, but I set the timer anyhow, just in case I couldn't put in the full hour. I spent 20 minutes on the kitchen/dishes.
Once I put Dorothy down for her first nap, I brought down all the boxes of mail/papers from my desk that need to be sorted. One of my least favorite jobs; I figured I would tackle it first.
After 40 minutes, I still had a lot to do, and I was on a roll, so I finished the hour sorting papers. Then I spent about another 10 minutes getting to a good stopping place. I still have another box to go, but it's the oldest box, so it should go the fastest. (I much prefer to sort old mail - it's mostly bills that I already paid online, or first notices where I responded to the second notice, and the occasional expired coupon that I probably never would have used anyhow, but can now throw out guilt-free.)
Then I called State Farm and got the van we're buying added to our insurance, the Mazda taken off, and finally added renters insurance. 15 minutes.
Day One tally: 1 hour 45 minutes. And it's only 1:20 pm; I might still try to squeeze in a bit of fun productivity, like finally finishing Dorothy's birthday letter or making some play dough. No super-heroic acts, but we're off to a pretty good start!
Monday, March 28, 2011
Hour-a-Day April
I kicked Jeremy and the kids out of the house for a few hours yesterday so I could spend some time cleaning. I got so much done in a few hours, it was incredible. I cleaned the living room, cleared the dining room table off completely, and reorganized the hall closet. It felt really good to sit down at the end of the day and feel so accomplished.
I was talking to a friend the other day who also has a baby and a toddler at home. We were both saying how hard it is to get things done with two kids. But, if we're honest with ourselves, we probably could do more. When company is coming, we manage to tidy up. You just need a little external motivation sometimes.
So this is my external motivation, and maybe it can be yours, too. For the month of April, I am going to commit to spending an hour every day doing something that I otherwise have a hard time finding time for. I'm going to spend one hour of each day being productive. This weekend reminded me how productive a few hours can be. Sometimes I look at how much there is to do, and the sheer volume freezes me up and I do nothing. I might not be able to do it all at once, but if I pick away at it an hour at a time, I should be able to make a big dent.
Are you thinking about joining me? Here's how it will work:
So, who's with me? Let's make April the most productive month of the year!
I was talking to a friend the other day who also has a baby and a toddler at home. We were both saying how hard it is to get things done with two kids. But, if we're honest with ourselves, we probably could do more. When company is coming, we manage to tidy up. You just need a little external motivation sometimes.
So this is my external motivation, and maybe it can be yours, too. For the month of April, I am going to commit to spending an hour every day doing something that I otherwise have a hard time finding time for. I'm going to spend one hour of each day being productive. This weekend reminded me how productive a few hours can be. Sometimes I look at how much there is to do, and the sheer volume freezes me up and I do nothing. I might not be able to do it all at once, but if I pick away at it an hour at a time, I should be able to make a big dent.
Are you thinking about joining me? Here's how it will work:
- Think of something that you normally have a hard time finding time for. Sewing, cleaning, painting, organizing, playing basketball, crossing things off your honey-do list, it's up to you! It can be one big project, or a bunch of little projects. For me, it's going to be sorting/organizing and deep cleaning. Those are the things I never seem to get to, because any motivation I have gets used up on the surface stuff before I get to it.
- Spend an hour every day working on your chosen project(s). Set a timer and stick to it. Kids need your attention? Stop the timer and give them your attention. You have all day to squeeze in that hour, and if your kids are anything like mine, it might happen five or ten minutes at a time. But by the end of the day, make sure you've clocked that hour. Know yourself. If the best way for you to get in your hour is to get up early, get up early. If you clean best after everyone else goes to bed, skip CSI. It's only for a month.
- Take one day off a week. If you're religious, you may already have a set sabbath, if not, just pick a day to be your "break" day. Or don't pick a day, and let it be a floating day off, so if you miss a day, you can just say, "Oh well, that was my day off." (Jewish bonus: There are 5 Saturdays in April, and only 4 Sundays. So you get one more day off than the Christians.)
- Keep others updated on your progress. Comment on this blog. Blog about it yourself, and send me the link. Tweet about it on Twitter and use the hash tag #HADA (Hour-A-Day April). Take pictures and post them to the HADA Flickr group. http://www.flickr.com/groups/hada/. Phone up your mom. Put a gold star on a chart.
- Don't give up. Missed a day? Just brush it off and get back on the proverbial horse the next day. Even if you only do half the days, that's still 15 hours more productivity than your April would have otherwise had.
- Celebrate when it's all over! If you live near me, let's go out to dinner together and order gooey chocolatey desserts. If you live far away, have your own celebration and tell me about it. Go ahead and splurge, you've earned it!
So, who's with me? Let's make April the most productive month of the year!
Sunday, March 06, 2011
Dads
(This is partially a response to this post about dads.)
We went to the park yesterday, as a family. I wore Dorothy in the Ergo, and Jeremy and I followed Valerie around as she showed her dad all her favorite park features. Eventually, Dorothy fell asleep, so she and I settled onto a park bench while Valerie and her dad kept playing.
I had never been to this particular park on a Saturday before. And maybe I'd just never paid attention before. But the park was full of dads. I counted more dads than moms, and none of the dads were sitting on benches. They were climbing on the structure, going down slides, swinging on swings, bouncing on the teeter totter, holding kids' hands, picking kids up, kissing their kids on their way down the slide, pushing kids on swings, teaching them how to pump their legs to swing higher, calmly redirecting them out of the swing radius so they wouldn't get kicked, reminding them of playground etiquette without yelling.
And I watched my best-friend-turned-father-of-my-children play with our daughter. I watched him celebrate with her as she went down the slide again, and again, and again, with genuine joy even on the 17th run. I watched their eyes light up as they laughed together. And I felt very blessed.
We went to the park yesterday, as a family. I wore Dorothy in the Ergo, and Jeremy and I followed Valerie around as she showed her dad all her favorite park features. Eventually, Dorothy fell asleep, so she and I settled onto a park bench while Valerie and her dad kept playing.
I had never been to this particular park on a Saturday before. And maybe I'd just never paid attention before. But the park was full of dads. I counted more dads than moms, and none of the dads were sitting on benches. They were climbing on the structure, going down slides, swinging on swings, bouncing on the teeter totter, holding kids' hands, picking kids up, kissing their kids on their way down the slide, pushing kids on swings, teaching them how to pump their legs to swing higher, calmly redirecting them out of the swing radius so they wouldn't get kicked, reminding them of playground etiquette without yelling.
And I watched my best-friend-turned-father-of-my-children play with our daughter. I watched him celebrate with her as she went down the slide again, and again, and again, with genuine joy even on the 17th run. I watched their eyes light up as they laughed together. And I felt very blessed.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Lions
We have a membership to the Philadelphia zoo, and we tend to go fairly often. One of the things I like about having a membership is that not every animal is "on" every time you visit. So, if the polar bears are sleepy today, you don't worry about it too much, and keep wandering until you find an animal that's being more interesting.
Yesterday, the polar bears weren't swimming, the giraffes and otters were off-exhibit, and I was starting to wonder if any of the animals were having a good day when we came to the lions. As we approached, the juvenile male and the adult male were having a bit of a scuffle. Cool! A lion fight! Now that makes for a fun zoo trip!
Once we got to the viewing window, the juvenile (I'm guessing at their roles) was put in his place, and he shuffled back to the cave where the females were.
"Mom! Dad is picking on me!"
Junior went to the back of the cave and hid, while mom came out to confront dad.
"How many times have I told you not to pick on Junior? Hey, look at me while I'm talking to you!
"Let's see how much you like being nipped on the ear!"
"Listen, woman.
"That boy needs to learn to stand up for himself."
"But..."
"Don't interrupt me! This is MY pride, and I will rule it as I see fit!
"Besides. He started it."
Yesterday, the polar bears weren't swimming, the giraffes and otters were off-exhibit, and I was starting to wonder if any of the animals were having a good day when we came to the lions. As we approached, the juvenile male and the adult male were having a bit of a scuffle. Cool! A lion fight! Now that makes for a fun zoo trip!
Once we got to the viewing window, the juvenile (I'm guessing at their roles) was put in his place, and he shuffled back to the cave where the females were.
"Mom! Dad is picking on me!"
Junior went to the back of the cave and hid, while mom came out to confront dad.
"How many times have I told you not to pick on Junior? Hey, look at me while I'm talking to you!
"Let's see how much you like being nipped on the ear!"
"Listen, woman.
"That boy needs to learn to stand up for himself."
"But..."
"Don't interrupt me! This is MY pride, and I will rule it as I see fit!
"Besides. He started it."
Oops
So, I finally sorted through Dorothy's drawer and purged the too-small clothing (again). I gotta say, I am looking forward to the "not outgrowing clothing on a weekly basis" age. Mostly because I am too lazy to sort through her clothes often enough, and tend to just dress her in whatever is sitting on top because it just came out of the wash.
In this week's purge, I found several of my favorite outfits from Valerie's baby days, and I sadly moved them directly to the too-small box. I also found the cute "little sister" outfit that my in-laws bought for Dorothy when she was born. I had stuck it in the bottom of the drawer, because it was so huge, and wouldn't fit her for ages.
The hat was too small, the pants were almost too short, and the top just fit. Oops.
I tried to do a "sisters" photo shoot, but we'd all had a long day, and the girls weren't feeling overly cooperative.
Oh well. Maybe I'll get a couple more wears out of the little sister onesie, and maybe even another photo-op.
And I bought a bunch of hangers so cute outfits stop getting lost in the bottom of drawers.
In this week's purge, I found several of my favorite outfits from Valerie's baby days, and I sadly moved them directly to the too-small box. I also found the cute "little sister" outfit that my in-laws bought for Dorothy when she was born. I had stuck it in the bottom of the drawer, because it was so huge, and wouldn't fit her for ages.
The hat was too small, the pants were almost too short, and the top just fit. Oops.
I tried to do a "sisters" photo shoot, but we'd all had a long day, and the girls weren't feeling overly cooperative.
Oh well. Maybe I'll get a couple more wears out of the little sister onesie, and maybe even another photo-op.
And I bought a bunch of hangers so cute outfits stop getting lost in the bottom of drawers.
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Four Months Old!
Dear Dorothy,
You are four months old, now!
Okay, let's get the practical matters out of the way, first. You need to stop growing so fast. Really. I just dug out the box of Valerie's 6-9 month clothes, and half of it is already too tight on you. I got out the boxes of 12 month clothes, but I just can't bring myself to put my four-month-old BABY in them yet. Besides, they are mostly summer clothes. So please, slow down a little, okay?
This month was a hard month in many ways, but also an awesome month in many other ways. The biggest event of this month was the day after you turned three months old, when we took you to CHOP to have your cleft lip repaired. You were so good, and so sweet, and it was so hard on me to see you sad, drugged up, and in pain. You wouldn't eat for 28 hours, and that day just seemed to last forever. But you have bounced back so amazingly well, it's hard to believe that it was only a month ago. Just the other day, you were making very distinct "p" noises, and it suddenly occurred to me that you probably couldn't have made those noises before the surgery. It was pretty neat to see positive results so soon.
The day after the surgery:
Nine days after the surgery:
One of the hardest things following the surgery was the elbow restraints you had to wear in order to keep you from pulling out your stitches. One of your favorite things in the world is chewing on your hands, and you would look at your hands with a look of confused betrayal as you moved all the right muscles, but the hands wouldn't come to your mouth. I remember the look of triumph on your face after they took them off and you could chew again, and the sideways glance you gave me as if to ask, "Really? You're not going to stop me?" I do feel a little bad though, because I think your lip looked better before we took the restraints off. It's more puffy, now, and I think it's because we're letting you chew on your hands. Or maybe because you fell on your face during tummy time the other day.
Trying very hard to bend that elbow:
We also had another stomach bug this month. That was no fun. It was our third of the season, and while you managed to catch very minor cases of the other two, this one hit you a bit harder. I almost wish I had taken pictures of your diapers, because I honestly had never seen so many different colors in baby poop before. Who knew babies could poop in neon and teal? You were such a trooper, though. There were only a handful of times when you were inconsolable, and as I rocked you, desperate to calm you down and having no idea what to do for you, I had a flashback to the early days with Valerie, and how I felt like that ALL THE TIME. Don't tell your sister, but even when you're sick and miserable, you're an easier baby than she was most of the time. I don't know how much of that is you just having a different personality, and how much is just me being more relaxed this time around, but either way, I'll take it.
Valerie loves you so much, and you really love her, too. When she wakes up in the morning, the first thing she asks is where you are, and if you have already gone down for your morning nap, she's so disappointed that she can't see you. She loves to tickle you and make you laugh, she wants to hold you all the time, and she is learning how to be gentle with you. Sometimes she might hit you, or give you toys that are choking hazards, but she means well, and she really does love you. You never have to have tummy time alone, because she's always right there beside you. And frankly, it was pretty hard to get your monthly pictures taken today, because she wanted to be in all of them. I'm really enjoying watching my two girls develop a friendship even from this early age. And I'm sure I'll be reminding you both of this many times when you're 10 and 12 years old and fighting like cats.
My cousin Allison came to visit this month, and you really enjoyed having her hold you. We ended up canceling our trip to Ottawa for Winterlude, due to illness. I'm sad that you missed this chance to meet your Vermont cousins, and to see Grandma and the Ottawa cousins again, but I think it was for the best. Hopefully, we'll be able to make up the trip in May for Tulipfest.
Developmentally, you seem to be doing pretty well. You're not rolling over yet, but I'm not worried. You seem to be channeling that energy into growing and talking instead (much like your older sister did). You're trying very hard to participate in our conversations, and it's really cute. It's very easy to make you smile and laugh, and Valerie and I make up silly songs all day long for your amusement. You love watching people, and if anyone other than me is holding you, your eyes follow my every move. You really do love your Mama. (That's okay, your Mama really loves you, too.)
You continue to be a really good sleeper, too. (Although I am a little afraid to type that, because I'm convinced that I will jinx it, and the four-month-sleep-regression monster will attack the minute I click "publish".) You take about three naps a day, and you sleep for one long stretch and two medium stretches most nights. I don't have to get out of bed to nurse you anymore, and I've started taking a clean diaper or two to bed with me so I can change you in bed, too. You sleep about two feet away from me in your side-carred crib (which has one side removed and is attached to my bed so that I can scoot you over to nurse you without picking you up). You actually seem to sleep better most nights with this little bit of space between us (except when you're not feeling well, when you like to be cuddled right up next to me). Some nights, I just lie there watching you sleep for a little while before drifting off, memorizing your creamy skin, your fuzzy hair (with the little tuft at the back that hasn't fallen out), your soft lips, your peaceful expression, the slow rise and fall of your chest.
The only times you ever really get cranky are when you have to poop, and when you need to sleep. I've mentally tattooed a reminded on your forehead that says, "If you can't figure out what's wrong with me, I probably need to sleep." When you get tired, I change you, take you upstairs to our room, swaddle you, nurse you if you're hungry, then hold you in a cradle hold and pat your back until you're almost asleep. Then I set you down in your crib, and you watch me leave as your eyes glass over. It's really surreal, because when people used to tell me to put Valerie down when she was "drowsy but not asleep" I thought they were crazy. But it totally works with you. You tend to wake up happy, too, most of the time. I recently put a mobile on your crib, and I know you're awake when I hear you giggling and talking to the animals in your mobile. I'm not sure how long we're going to keep swaddling you, but it's working right now, and I'd hate to mess with a good thing.
It's been a roller coaster of a month, with surgery, illness, snow, and a few gorgeous park days right at the end to round things out. Frankly, I'm pretty worn out from it, and I'm hopeful that next month will bring more calm days. But I'm glad I took the time to reflect, because there really was a lot of good, too. Thank you for being a jewel in my life.
Love,
Mama.
Thursday, February 03, 2011
Naptime
Valerie went to sleep late last night. And woke up early this morning. So, even though she hasn't been taking naps very often lately, I was sure she would take one today. I even managed to get Dorothy to sleep at Valerie's nap time - the holy grail of two-kid parenting.
I tried to lie down and take a nap myself, but Valerie wouldn't stay down. Every few minutes, it was something else. "I have to go peepee in the potty," "I dropped my cup and I can't reach it." I was tired and starting to get fed up. I gave her some books, and told her to stay in bed and read. It worked for a few minutes, then she was up again. After about an hour, I decided that she could just play quietly by herself while I rested my eyes. I knew I wouldn't sleep, because I would be mentally analyzing every noise to piece together what she was up to, but it would be better than nothing.
Then it got quiet. Which usually means trouble. So I went to check on her. I opened the door to discover that she had emptied out both sock drawers.
"What are you doing?"
"I'm looking for my socks!"
And then I started laughing. I had to.
"I think you found them."
Dorothy would be waking up soon anyway, so I might as well give up on the nap. I grabbed the camera, and we had an impromptu photo shoot.
And we played hide-and-seek (when did she get to be old enough for hide-and-seek?). And I even got to rest my eyes for a minute by hiding in the bed.
I think, sometimes, you have to be firm as a parent. And other times, you just have to roll with it, or times like this will slip you by. She won't be two forever. (Thank goodness.)
I tried to lie down and take a nap myself, but Valerie wouldn't stay down. Every few minutes, it was something else. "I have to go peepee in the potty," "I dropped my cup and I can't reach it." I was tired and starting to get fed up. I gave her some books, and told her to stay in bed and read. It worked for a few minutes, then she was up again. After about an hour, I decided that she could just play quietly by herself while I rested my eyes. I knew I wouldn't sleep, because I would be mentally analyzing every noise to piece together what she was up to, but it would be better than nothing.
Then it got quiet. Which usually means trouble. So I went to check on her. I opened the door to discover that she had emptied out both sock drawers.
"What are you doing?"
"I'm looking for my socks!"
And then I started laughing. I had to.
"I think you found them."
Dorothy would be waking up soon anyway, so I might as well give up on the nap. I grabbed the camera, and we had an impromptu photo shoot.
And we played hide-and-seek (when did she get to be old enough for hide-and-seek?). And I even got to rest my eyes for a minute by hiding in the bed.
I think, sometimes, you have to be firm as a parent. And other times, you just have to roll with it, or times like this will slip you by. She won't be two forever. (Thank goodness.)
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